Gonna go me some RV’n…’

Ah, RVs. When you pass an RV on the highway, you can’t not say… “Yea, gonna get me one-a those when I retire.” And then, you realize that retirement is like… really far away, even if you retire at all. (Remember what Retirement was in Blade Runner? This is bad.) So, my answer is to retire now. Boom. Go quit your job, right now. I’ll wait…

….. Dumti, dum…

Oh, wait, it’s Saturday. Doh! Ok, so do it Monday. I’m down with that.

Oki doki. All set? Good. Now let’s go shoppin’ for a cool RV…

Oh! Look at this! My boy Scotty sent me this cool pict of WHAT RVS SHOULD LOOK LIKE NOW! Not the stoooopid boxes you see rollin’ around on the highway like Roach Coaches!! I MEAN, WHAT’S UP WITH THAT??? YOU SPEND 125 GRAND ON A BOX?? WWAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!! Did you forget that coffins are boxes, too? And like, if you don’t have enough money for an urn, they put YOU in a box?? Then dump you in the ocean with the rest of the fish food? Maybe it’s just me, but that doesn’t sound like an RV Adventure.

Ok. This RV is cool. Only,… it’s just a model and not real. Which means we can’t buy it. Hold on while I bang my head against my table for a sec…

DOOSH…

Why do RV companies insist on designing non-design? And I’m not even gonna talking lame-o graphics on the side which they ALL have. (Wait, let me just whip up an orange an purple swipe quick-like because I have an appointment to get my butt waxed.) They should be bitchin’. Not that this one is totally bitchin,’ but it’s a start. It’s the funk on wheels. So, I say build it and I’ll take it for a spin up PCH from Malibu to the tall trees. Who’s comin…?’

Note to RV Companies: Make cool stuff or quit you job. Your choice. I’ll wait.

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