All I wanted was COFFEE…

So, a couple month ago, the Vons on PCH closed it’s doors for remodeling. But the day before, they had a 50% off sale, so…. Kathie and hoofed it and snagged 28 bags of groceries for next to nothing. And had a blast doing it, of course. (Check out my earlier post.)

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Today... we were driving home, minding our own business when Kathie said, “Hey, let’s get some Joe! Do you think the new Vons is open now?” I’m like… “Let’s go, doodette! I got a hankerin’ for a Java Jolt!”

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We arrived at the “new” Vons… literally as they started the ribbon cutting ceremony! And I’m like, “Holy Crap! It’s the ribbon cutting ceremony!” Then, Kathie exclaimed… “Hey! They’re cutting the ribbon right now!” Then… everyone in the whole crowd turned to us said, “HEY! We’re cutting the ribbon for the ribbon ceremony, RIGHT NOW!!” Can you believe THAT??!! …Wow, it was cool…

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I instantly took pix for the blog here, then B-lined like a squirrel on steroids for the new “Starbucks with a view.” And inside… we met super cool car dood, Richard. (Took a pic of him, too.) Then,… we took a pic of the Starbucks Singers! And I’m like, “Holy Crap! There’s Starbucks Singers!!” Then, Richard turned to us and said, “Hey Fireball! Check out the Starbucks Singers! Wow!” Then, the entire store turned to us, all at the same time and in perfect harmonic unison and said “AAHHHHHH…….WE HAVE STARBUCKS SINGERS!!!!” ……..Wow… it was so cool.

SWISHING PAN CUT TO FADE ACROSS DUTCH ANGLE DOLLY:

This store was outta control! I mean, it was jammed… (except for the vegetarian isle.) Which, of course is exactly what we wanted.

I said… “Holy Crap, there’s no one here!” Then Kathie said, “Holy Veggie Cow, you’re right!” Then…

Well, …there wasn’t anyone in there, duh. What do you expect? I mean, c’mon.

Anywho. The City Councilman Bill Rosenthal showed up and cut the ribbon, then went inside for some free beef jerky. Vons X-ex showed up and made a presentation. And they went inside for some Ding Dongs. Kathie and I showed up… and we got free coffee.

Ah, life at the Bu…

Gettin’ the DEAL on… a must READ.

Ok, this is hysterical… so you gotta read it, peeps.

So… Kathie got me up at 4:30 this morning because VONS was having a super deal. I’m like… c’mon. What kind of deal is worth getting to Vons by 6am? “Are you outta your mind?”

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We’re at Vons… in line outside. Two Carts. Can you picture this? It’s dark, coffee in hand and we’re waiting for the doors to open at 7. Oh man… what have I got myself into?

7am… The doors open to reveal that the store is closing and getting a refurb. And EVERYTHING is 50% off! We’re like… WOO HOO! OUTTA MY WAY!!!! The store was a mess, the line went on for almost 50 yards and we were the 3rd in line! We began to carve the crap outta that place with two carts. Aisle after aisle, my hands were moving at lightning speed. CHOCOLATE, CHOCOLATE, CHOCOLATE!!!! MY LIFE IS A BLISS NIGHTMARE!!!

But what was the result? Somebody calculated wrong… Uh, oh…

My cart added up to $280.00. Kathie’s cart added up to $290.00. That’s just under $600 bucks worth of Veggie Burgs, Chips, Chocolate and Wine! (We got a couple other things too, so don’t freak.) But once they took off the discount of the 20 full bags of groceries… the grand total was…

 

 

$200!!! SHWING! JAHOOOOOOGA!!! I LOVE MATH WHEN IT GOES ALL SCREWY!!

We were like… “What the heck?” Even the checker was like “What the heck?” Then, the bag boy looked at it and said, “What the heck?” Then the ENTIRE STORE looked over and all said in perfect unison… “WHAT THE HECK!!???” (Ok… slight exag, but it was way outta control.)

All I know is… it paid to get my butt outta bed early…

Then… we had to carry all the bags up several flights. And that sucked.

Then… someone hit a fire hydrant out in front of our house and the highway is now fully 100% shut down. THEN… Kathie cut her finger with a knife while trying to open a plastic thingy. THEN… She went back to bed. Boom. Bam. Thank you Ma’am.

I’m exhausted …and it’s only 8:30.